Who Needs Kanye West When We Have Donald Glover?

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Let me just set the tone of this piece with a smooth Kanye can go fuck himself. We have a real genius in the building, totes forgot what that even looked like. Thanks for the refresher Donald! Confidence is being comfortable in your skin and speaking truth to power not just being an arrogant asshole oh yeeeeah…

So this past week I’ve witnessed the final descent of an artist who once inspired me to tell stories. There I was, thirteen years old sitting in the back of my brother’s car minding my business when I heard beats. My neck reacted with that bop & swerve combo blackfolk do when the beat is too clean. I was like, “who is thisssss?” as I swallowed my annoyance at my brother because he kept switching through tracks.

But what sold me were the skits. I went from hearing amazing songs with funny lyrics to a hilarious skit of “Broke Phi Broke” frat brothers stepping in pride. And the cycle just continued. A bop, a laugh – repeat. I couldn’t wait for my brother to pick me up again, so I went out and bought my first album: The College Dropout.

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Utopia is African. You Will Want Us to Sit At Your Table.

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I just wanted to start off with…in a little over three weeks Black Panther has made over $1,000,000,000 and counting in the global box office. I’m weary of celebrating, but I’ll do my best… 

I am just sitting here thinking about how magnificent Black people are. I just read an article about a package explosion that killed two black people in Austin, Texas. And I’m just like, “Man we’ve got vigilantes killing us again?” Just like George Zimmerman, just like the Charleston mass shooter, and now we’re being bombed again? Again. Black people have been lynched, bombed, shot – on a state and federal level – imprisoned, drugged, just anything to get rid of us.

This country has done everything it could. And it astonishes me how we have not folded. We only keep rising. That is why I can’t believe Black Panther right now. It might be the only film that has made a billion dollars in under a month. That’s an authentically black film with black themes set in a black Utopia, also known as Wakanda. This dream undeferred. A dream I have been taught would never happen. We’re living in the impossible right now. What they said was impossible is happening. Even as this juggernaut is upon us and we live in this moment, we are still being kept down. We rise and we suffer simultaneously. 

Continue reading “Utopia is African. You Will Want Us to Sit At Your Table.”

7 Reasons Why Mr. Big is the Fuckboy G.O.A.T.

I recently re-watched Sex and the City and I gotta say that although it stands as a classic the show isn’t aging well. First of all I could go on about the fashion because HOLY SHIT. Remember back in the day when Carrie Bradshaw/Sarah Jessica Parker was hailed as a fashion icon? Maaan I was watching that shit cringing the whole time. But we can all agree that the 2000s will go down in history as one of the worse times for fashion and SATC couldn’t help but be a snapshot of those bleak ass times.

But that’s not why I’m here. I’m here today because as I watched this show I realized how much we romanticized Mr. Big and Carrie. Even the hood was fuckin wit it right down to Jay Z’s line in ’03 Bonnie & Clyde:

Only time we don’t speak is during “Sex and the City”
She gets Carrie fever, but soon as the show is over
She’s right back to being my soldier

I remember also yearning for the great love that Carrie aspired for. I remember the series finale when she said that line that fell right in tune with my teenage soul:

I’m someone who is looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t-live-without-each-other love. And I don’t think that love is here in this expensive suite in this lovely hotel in Paris.

Continue reading “7 Reasons Why Mr. Big is the Fuckboy G.O.A.T.”

Nobody Made You Do a Got. Damned. Thing Taylor

I’m like a week late watching Taylor Swiftless snitch on herself I know, I know. But I love myself a lot so why would I be in a rush to watch this bullshit? It’s eternally #TeamSelfCare all day ’round here bruh.

Before I begin this flame session, for all my masochists outchea you can watch this dumpster fire here… but I promise you family. You are better off saving the four minutes and sixteen seconds of your life. Don’t look at me like that when I’m only lookin out for you. One day you’ll be thinking bout these seconds on ya deathbed don’t play. I myself wish I could get that time back but I watched it so you specifically wouldn’t have too. You could use those precious minutes to donate to Hurricane Harvey relief, watch some old Beyonce’ concert footage, or treat yoself to a couple of @lalasizahands89 videos.

Now I know y’all said the Look What You Made Me Do video was terrible … but GOT. damned. You ever need to see some shit to believe it? Dass me right now. People love to drag folks these days for anything so I didn’t wanna hop on that bandwagon, but nah son. By all means, Swiftless earned this one. Her blonde white girl privilege allows her to roam freely within a white supremacist society so she don’t gotta work too hard, but she inadvertently put the work in for this dragging. Particularly drag this bitch ’til winter comes for the sake of the culture.

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#CallEmOut: dream hampton Gets Dragged

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Man. What I’ve witnessed on Twitter these past two days have been juicy at best, but disappointing at worst. I love everything about the #BlackLivesMatter movement because I’ve longed for a movement like this for some time. It felt like we sat idly while injustice took root in this country’s psyche and I found it infuriating. But like so many people, I thought that little ole me couldn’t do shit about it. But here comes the birth of this movement simply called Black Lives Matter, made up of several activists (regular people) tired of the mistreatment of black Americans. The most visible workers in the movement to me are Deray Mckesson and Johnetta “Netta” Elzie, along with the help of a myriad of activists on the ground. Following these two on Twitter and seeing them actually do the work and really risk their lives is nothing short of inspiring. For the first time, I feel like we can be free because of people like Brittany Packyetti, Brittany Ferrell, Patrice Cullors – anybody committed to black liberation. But this is not a perfect struggle, hence: struggle.

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